a tool for myself and others

I am hoping that this blog can be a place for me to reflect deeply on my life and work. Settling into a life of active support of the Chamorro community of Guam in their struggles for self-determination and a community free of U.S. military colonization, I find myself often mired in the day-to-day, often bipolar, reality of the community and legislative work it takes to do this thing.

As a white woman in a culture that is of color, and colonized (multiple times) by people of my complexion, I work hard to be accepted. That comes often at the price of my self-esteem, and my certainty of the choices I have made. If there's anything I hold onto daily, it's that I am actively taking responsibility for the actions of my forebears-- and that the cumulative effects of those actions on the people I live with is... inestimable. Hard to describe and fully understand.

I sometimes become a target, I sometimes become an incarnation of oppressive forces for others, I sometimes am the "one white person" folks say they can trust.

It's more difficult because all of these things, the negative and positive views of me, are not me. While I can take the projections of who I am I cannot let it define me. Getting more grounded in my true convictions and the motivations for my work is part of what this blog is about.

I hope this can also be a tool for others doing similar work. Or others wondering about what it means to be committed to this work.

Please always contact me if you have questions or feedback for me. Constructive criticism and reflections are always welcome, and necessary.